Lines

I remember when my family moved from Riley, KS to Garden City, KS. I was 7 and thought it was a grand adventure. We had a big moving truck in our driveway and had worked hard all day packing everything we owned into that truck. By nightfall, everyone was exhausted and ready for a break...or not quite. Really, the adults had worked hard all day and were ready for a break while the kids (my brothers, cousins and I) were much too excited and full of energy. We were running around, climbing in and on the truck, and most likely driving all of the adults nuts. Finally, my mom came out and told us to leave the truck alone. She said the next person to touch the truck would have to stay in the empty house with her and dad, rather than spending the night with our cousins at their house. The line had been drawn.

The problem was, and still is, that I like to walk lines. I have this strange compulsion to see how close I can get to the line without going over. And when I do accidentally cross the line? I quickly look around to see if anyone noticed and then go right back to that line to see if I can get that close without going over this time.

So what did we do with the line my mom had drawn? We made a game of it, of course. The goal was to get as close as possible to the truck without actually touching it, but after awhile that was boring and we decided to up the stakes. One of us would stand with our finger millimeters away from the truck, while another person would give them a "little" push. If you moved fast enough, you still didn't touch the truck. If you didn't move fast enough...well, we would quickly look towards to house to make sure we hadn't been caught and then go right back to the truck. As usually happens when you are crossing the line, someone finally got caught. Me. I remember being so mad because I had to stay at the house while my brothers got to leave. I wasn't at all repentant about being disobedient. I was just mad that I had been caught while others hadn't. And of course my defense was that "everyone else was doing it".

As I was remembering this, I thought about how often I do that with sin. The line has been drawn but I do my best to walk right up to it without going over. If I accidentally cross the line I just look around to make sure I wasn't "caught" and then go right back to the line. But am I repentant when I am caught? Or am I just mad because "everyone else is doing it" but I am the only one who is suffering the consequences?

"Finally, brothers, whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable—if anything is excellent or praiseworthy—think about such things." Philippians 4:8

The line has been drawn. Yet here I sit surrounded by the world and I don't appear any different because I'm trying to get as close to that line as possible. I listen to the same music, watch the same movies and tv shows, frequent the same establishments, read the same books, etc. I'm called to be different, to be set apart, but am I? How is the world going to know I'm different if not by my actions? And when I deal with the consequences of my actions, am I repentant, or upset at being "caught"?

"Do not love the world or anything in the world. If anyone loves the world, the love of the Father is not in him." 1 John 2:15

"You are the salt of the earth. But if the salt loses its saltiness, how can it be made salty again? It is no longer good for anything, except to be thrown out and trampled by men. You are the light of the world. A city on a hill cannot be hidden. Neither do people light a lamp and put it under a bowl. Instead they put it on its stand, and it gives light to everyone in the house. In the same way, let your light shine before men, that they may see your good deeds and praise your Father in heaven." Matthew 5:13-16

I've been doing it all wrong. Rather than trying to get as close to sin as possible, I need to get as close to God as possible. Rather than trying to walk the line between sin and obedience, I should cross the line between obedience and loving obsession. Rather than having people question my actions, I want to shine before men so that they will praise my Father in heaven. Care to join me?